 | Category: Rabbi |  |  |  |
1. - The sermon The rabbi is speaking to his lower East Side congregation and he says, "with Hashem's help we shall walk but first, we must crawl." The congregation replies to the Rebbe with exclamations of "ahmei... (Rabbi, Lower, East, Side, With, Help, Shall, Walk, First, Must, Crawl, Rabbi, Then, Soon, Will, Before, Again, Pious, Himself, Into, Frenzy, Reach, Land, Provide, Ecstatic, Back, Sermon, That, Deep, Your, Make, Generous, Pledge, Fund) | -
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2. - three progressive rabbis Three rabbis were bragging about how liberal they were.
Rabbi #1: "We have ashtrays by the seats."
Rabbi #2: "That's nothing! Come Yom Kippur service, we hand out sandwiches... h... (Three, Were, Bragging, About, Liberal, They, Rabbi, Have, That, Nothing, Come, Service, Hand, When, High, Come, Lock, Sign) | -
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3. - Collision Course There was an amazing accident involving a Rabbi and a Priest. The cars are completetly shaterred though the Rabbi and the Preist don't even bare a scratch on them The Preists looks at the rabbi's k... (There, Accident, Rabbi, Priest, Though, Even, Bare, Scratch, Them, Rabbi, Then, Collar, Well, Look, This, Both, None, Must, Sign, That, Should, Wine, Bottle, With, David, Broken, Look, From, Drink, Priest, Until, Half, Done, Then, Where, Have, Think, Wait, Police) | -
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4. - dyslexic Rabbi? Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi? He walks around saying, "Yo." (Hear, About, Rabbi, Around) | -
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5. - priest and a rabbi A priest and a rabbi go walking Down the street and this 13 year old boy walks in front of them The Priest Says " That boy is so hot isn't he"?
The Rabbi Replys "What are you talki... (Priest, Rabbi, Down, This, Year, Front, Priest, That, Rabbi, What, About, Again, Very, Think, Mean, Well, Screw) | -
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6. - Recovering Rabbi The President of the synagogue went to visit the Rabbi in the hospital, who had just suffered a mild heart-attack.
He says, "Rabbi, the board just voted 12 to 8 to wish you a speedy recovery!" (President, Synagogue, Went, Visit, Rabbi, Hospital, Just, Mild, Heart, Attack, Board, Wish, Speedy, Recovery) | -
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7. - The gift There was a young man, who was known for his lack of study and the rabbi of the congregation, was not about to let this go unnoticed. He performed his Bar Mitzvah, and rose to the occasion as best ... (There, Young, Known, Lack, Study, Rabbi, About, This, Rose, Occasion, Best, Could, With, Minimal, Preparation, When, Came, Time, Hand, Usual, Bible, From, Then, Added, Special, Gift, Said, Have, Many, Today, Book, Form, That, Will, Enrich, Your, Life, Make, Umbrella, Behind, Told, Become) | -
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8. - rabbi substitutes for priest A Catholic priest was manning a confession booth for several hours and wanted relief. He asked his friend the rabbi to fill in for him. When the rabbi said he had no experience, he asked the rabbi ... (Catholic, Priest, Manning, Confession, Booth, Several, Relief, Friend, Rabbi, Fill, When, Said, Experience, Stay, With, Observe, What, That, Committed, Adultery, Told, Hail, Next, Woman, Then, Knew, Could, Take, Over, Different, Came, Around, Many, Once, More, Special, Three, Five) | -
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9. - Stolen watch Sammy has stolen the rabbi's gold watch.
He didn't feel too good about it, so he decided, after a sleepless night.
to go to the rabbi.
'Rabbi, I stole a gold watch.' <... (Sammy, Stolen, Rabbi, Gold, Watch, Feel, Good, About, Night, Rabbi, Stole, That, Forbidden, Should, Return, What, Shall, Give, Back, Want, Said, That, Case, Keep) | -
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10. - The Watch Jack has stolen the rabbi's gold watch and afterwards felt guilty about what he did.
After a sleepless night, he went to the rabbi.
"Rabbi, I stole a gold watch."
"But ... (Jack, Stolen, Rabbi, Gold, Watch, Felt, Guilty, About, What, Night, Went, Rabbi, Stole, That, Forbidden, Should, Return, What, Shall, Give, Back, Want, Said, Case, Keep) | -
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