 | Category: Bar |  |  | | |
1. Irish dui
Late one Friday in Dublin, a policeman spotted a man driving very erratically.
He pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening.
"Aye, so I have. 'Ties Frida...
(Late, Friday, Dublin, Policeman, Very, Over, Been, That, Have, Know, Where, Seven, Then, There, Something, Happy, Hour, They, These, Which, Quite, Good, Four, Five, Those, Then, Drive, Friend, Mike, Home, Course, Couple, Rude, Another, Bottle, Later, Around, Coat, Until, Held, Said) | -
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2. Steering wheel
So a guy walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants.
When he walks up to the bar and orders a drink, the bar tender
says:
"Gee that must be a bit annoying mate"
(Into, With, Wheel, Down, When, Drink, That, Must, Mate, Yeah) | -
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3. Twelve inch pianist
This guy walks into a bar, pulls out a tiny piano and stool, and a tiny little
man. The tiny man sits down, and starts to play the piano. This other guy
notices it.
" Hey, what's...
(This, Into, Tiny, Piano, Stool, Little, Down, Play, Other, What, That, Twelve, Inch, Pianist, Found, This, Magic, Lamp, Made, Wish, With, Minute, Later, Million, Fill, Room, Think) | -
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4. Desk clerk at a hotel
At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking what time
the bar opens.
"It opens at noon", answers the clerk.
About an hour, later he gets a call from the same ...
(Desk, Clerk, Hotel, Call, From, Drunk, What, Time, Noon, About, Hour, Later, Same, Even, What, Open, Same, Before, Another, Again, Whatnot, Shay, Then, Wait, Have, Room, Service, Send, Something, Want) | -
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5. Jilted
The couple was dining out when the wife noticed
a familiar face at the bar.
" Elliot," she said, pointing, "Do you see that
man drowning bourbon at the bar?" The husband
look...
(Couple, When, Wife, Familiar, Face, Elliot, Said, That, Bourbon, Husband, Over, Well, Woman, Continued, Been, Like, Since, Meal, Even, Worth, Much) | -
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6. Guy talks to barman
Customer: (to bartender)
"My wife and I just got into a knock down, drag out fight!"
Bartender: What happened?
Customer: When it was all over, she came crawling to me on he...
(Bartender, Wife, Just, Into, Knock, Down, Drag, Fight, Bartender, What, When, Over, Came, Said, Come, From, Under, That, Right, Coward, Kick, Your, Butt, Again) | -
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7. Newly issued alcohol warnings
The Toronto Board of Health has proposed that warning signs be placed on all alcohol bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of drinking a pint or two of any alcoholic beverage.
(Toronto, Board, Health, That, Alcohol, About, Possible, Peril, Pint, Alcoholic, Beverage, Consumption, Cause, Wake, With, Breath, Could, Knock, Buzzard, Dead, Animal, Hundred, Away, Major, Factor, Like, Idiot, Tell, Same, Story, Over, Again, Until, Your, Want, Assault, Boss, What) | -
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8. Scotch & Water
An old woman is in the bar of a cruise ship and she asks the bartender for a
scotch and two drops of water.
As the bartender gives her a drink she says, "It's my birthday today and
(Woman, Cruise, Ship, Bartender, Scotch, Water, Drink, Birthday, Today, Celebrate, Well, Since, Your, Fact, Take, Care, This, Right, Guess, Should, Year, Bartender, Want, Left, Since, Only, Around, That, Bought, Might, Well, Dying, Curiosity, Sonny, Learn, When, Hold, Liquor, Sure) | -
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9. Ugly Chick
A man is out, driving happily along in his car late one
Saturday evening. Before too long, the cops pull him over.
The policeman walks up to the man and asks, "Have you
been drinki...
(Along, Late, Before, Long, Pull, Over, Policeman, Have, Road, Were, Ugly, Chick, Passenger, Seat, That, Gave, Away) | -
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10. Husband,wife with Beer
A pissed-off wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time
in a bar, so one night he took her along with him. "What'll you have?" he asked.
"Oh, I don't know. The...
(Wife, About, Husband, Free, Time, Night, Took, Along, With, What, Have, Know, Same, Suppose, Couple, Jack, Daniel, Threw, Down, Shot, Then, From, Glass, Spat, Yuck, That, Terrible, Drink, This, Stuff, Well, There, Cried, Think, Myself, Every) | -
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408 Hits / 0.048 Seconds
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