 | Category: Animal |  |  | | |
1. The cat's chalkboard assignments
In order to punish your cat for poor behavior, here are a list of items that
the cat may write on a chalkboard. A. Fill in the blanks
1. [xxx] is not food.
Dental floss, plants, K...
(Order, Punish, Your, Poor, Here, List, That, Write, Chalkboard, Fill, Food, Dental, Kleenex, Toilet, Paper, Human, Homework, Couch, Phone, Cord, Poop, Electric, Fish, Around, Play, With, Huge, Other, Will, Jump, Kitchen, Table, Stove, Barbecue, Full, Bladder, Night, From, Wardrobe) | -
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2. Elephant Tampon
Q: What does an elephant use as tampon?
A: A sheep.
(What, Elephant, Tampon, Sheep) | -
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3. Don't need a Porsche
There once was a horse and a chicken that were really good friends. One day while walking throught the swamp the horse fell into a huge mud puddle. Unable to get out, he asked the chicken to go and...
(There, Once, Horse, Chicken, That, Were, Good, While, Swamp, Fell, Into, Huge, Puddle, Before, Sank, Bottom, Farm, Find, Anywhere, Back, Tied, Rope, Threw, Other, Very, Said, Would, Long, Through, Woods, Again, Help, Cock, Grab, Then, Safety, Moral, This, Story, Built, Like, Need, Pick) | -
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4. Question and answer animal jokes
Q: What has four legs and an arm?
A: A happy pit bull.
Q: Why is a tree like a dog?
A: Because they both lose their bark when they die.
Q: Did you hear about the cowboy wh...
(What, Four, Happy, Bull, Tree, Like, Because, They, Both, Lose, Their, Bark, When, Hear, About, Cowboy, Himself, Dachshund, Everyone, Kept, Long, Little, Between, Social, Your, Back, From, Breed, They, With, Collie, Goes, Help, Know, There, Elephant, Under, Your, Nose, Cross, Rhinoceros) | -
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5. A man and a Bartender
A man was at the bar and asked for a shot and so the bartender gave him the
drink the man drank it then looked in his pocket. Then the man asked for another
so the bartender again gave it...
(Shot, Bartender, Gave, Drink, Drank, Then, Pocket, Then, Another, Again, Took, Same, Thing, Kept, Said, There, Picture, Wife, When, Good, That, Will, Home) | -
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6. Blonde Bird Watcher
A blonde and her father are walking down a street when the father says, "Look,
a dead bird."
And the blonde looks up and says, "Where?"
(Blonde, Father, Down, Street, When, Look, Dead, Bird, Where) | -
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7. Here, Piggy, Piggy
An old farmer and his wife had a bunch of pigs, and every morning the farmer
would head out to feed them. And every morning, he would see all the pigs
screwing up a storm. He would get tu...
(Wife, Bunch, Every, Would, Head, Feed, Them, Storm, This, Back, House, Time, Screw, Always, Soft, Before, There, Took, Hatchet) | -
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8. Dead Dog
A man wakes up to find his dog, dead, lying next to the bed on the floor. He
doesn't believe his dog is dead, so he takes him to the vet, and the vet says,
"I'm sorry, but your dog is dea...
(Find, Dead, Lying, Next, Floor, Believe, Sorry, Your, Want, Second, Opinion, Doctor, Goes, Into, Back, Over, Again, Another, That, Will, Tell, Well, Scan, Test) | -
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9. Why do elephants squirt water through their noses?
Why do elephants squirt water through their noses?
If they squirted it through their tails, it'd be very difficult to aim.
(Squirt, Water, Through, Their, They, Very, Difficult) | -
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10. Doe in the Woods
Q: What did the doe say when she came running out of the woods?
A: I'll never do that for two bucks again.
(What, When, Came, Running, Woods, Never, That, Again) | -
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